A month ago, my dad died. I've dropped my extracurriculars, I'm down to two classes, I've stopped working (tutoring, which I used to love), and I have a hard time relating to people. As an added bonus, my family life is terrible., how do I get through this? I feel lost and alone.
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I can't tell you how to get through it, but I can tell you what worked for me. I lost my own dad about a year ago. Even though I've been out on my own for a long time now, it was still a devastating experience, it was the end of a part of my world. But it was only part of my world. I needed to work my jobs, do my shit, no matter how much my heart hurt. No matter the unresolved issues. No matter what my asshole brother said at the funeral. All I could do was what I had to, just going through the motions. Most of the time, those first few months, I felt like I was walking underwater through a world of grey. But I just pushed on through, and eventually the resistance left and the color came back. Amusements and distractions didn't work for me. It all felt stupid, trivial, pointless. It was just a matter of maintaining forward momentum.
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You are the same person you were two months ago. This was the epiphany that I finally reached that put me in a better mindset. I miss my dad, and want to talk to him all the time. But I like to think that before he died he was comforted that I was prepared, turned into a man by his guidance, and proud to call him my dad while speaking of him after he left. You are an extension of your father, and through your actions and carrying on his successful traits you will be sharing what he was with people as well as yourself. In parenting my daughter, I often times find myself acting like my dad did with me, and it is a bitter sweet reminder of what he had given me, and how parts of him are still here.
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Struggling through the same thing. It sucks a lot I don't feel like the same person anymore. It will get better though. It just takes time.
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Condolences, dude. From experience, just take whatever time you need to deal things will just work themselves out. I found that hanging around friends, and doing 'busy' work helped take my mind off of things.
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Everyone copes in their own way. Taking a little break can be a very good thing, just avoid the desire to isolate yourself and give up on your interests and goals, those are the things that will help you get through it in the long run, even if it doesn't seem like it now.
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Your school should have counciling services available for free. Talking to someone might help you work through what youve been feeling
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I lost my father in September last year. There's no magic trick or quote that you'll find on the internet that will make you feel better. Time will not heal the wound it'll just dull the pain. Go on, because that's all you can do. At some point you'll realize you can keep on keeping on and hopefully, eventually, keeping him in your mind and his spirit alive in you will be enough. Surround yourself with friends and family, remember him now so you can remember him in the future.
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Profesional help. If you are at college go see the therapist, also they can help you with getting on meds.
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My dad died two months ago, incredibly sudden. My mom and I are still trying to figure out what happened because often it doesn't seem real. My wife sorted through his jackets while we were still at my mom's, and I picked out two of his coats that I always loved. I wear one of them, without fail, every day. I feel a little better having something of his wrapped around me. At first it was a constant reminder that he was gone, but now it's just a constant reminder of him. Some days are extremely hard, others not so much. I think talking with my mom via email or phone every day has helped us both. If you need to talk to someone about this more, feel free to message me.
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