who have had to kill in self defense, Did you ever recover psychologically? What is it to live knowing you killed someone regardless you didn't want to do it?
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"I killed many men during my time in Vietnam. I still can see alot of the faces and in my minds eye every face is covered by the sight picture of my M14. I had a real hard time coping toward the end of my tour and I was hiding in heroin. The one that really gets me and I will never forget was a sapper who ran in with a bomb on him. He did not detonate and I ran toward him and just started beating the shit out of him. I was 6 foot 3 220lbs he was maybe 5 foot 5 120 at best. We rolled on the dirt until I got on top and smashed his skull in. I can see clear as a bell his head conforming to the impact and the blood coming out his ear. I just kept smashing. I dont know why I lived. Its a odd feeling to kill someone by hand it's so so personal. It changed me forever I didn't see "gooks" I saw men fighting for what they believed just as hard as I was fighting for what I believed. I gained respect that day. "
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I got assaulted in an alley in New Orleans 20 years ago. The guy hit me in the back of the head, cut me a few times with a knife, put the knife to my throat and told me that he was going to rape and kill me. I choked him to death. Felt his windpipe crumble in my hands. I've had PTSD ever since. Constant nightmares. I see his face turn red, blue, and purple. I hear the crunch of his windpipe. I feel him struggle against me. I have scars I see every time I get out of the shower. I did what I had to do and don't regret it but killing a man with your bare hands is a lifelong struggle.
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"Why does everyone call out "I have a gun"? That seems to endanger yourself more, where if the robber also has a gun, he's now prepared to shoot. Aren't you better off with a surprise attack? "
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i was jumped by 4 guys about 10 years ago. i was down on the ground and they were kicking and punching me. i grabbed my knife from my pocket, reached up and stabbed one of them in the stomach. blood everywhere. some mine, mostly his. they all ran. one of them yelled back that he would find me later and kill me. he later died at a hospital because he took too long to get help. basically i never really felt bad about it and i dont regret it. it has popped into my head randomly from time to time and it wierds me out that i took a persons life but thats about it.. doesnt last long. my thoughts about it are that i was protecting myself and whether or not they would have killed me i feel it was not just justified but exactly what i should have done. Edit: I have answered almost every question possible. Look through my post history and you'll find the answer to 99% or questions.
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My great grandfather killed a home invader in self defense. Story goes they were living in seskatchewan in the winter , family at dinner table and a man came in with a shotgun demanding food or similar. Gg got up from dinner, didnt say anything. Grabbed the guy and the gun and threw him across the room into the wall, broke his neck, then threw him out the door into the snow and left for dead, and sat back down to dinner. Is probably reason grandma and about a hundred descendants are here today. When you have to defend yourself remember generations after you will know you saved them too.
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Someone I know killed her boyfriend in self defense during a brutal domestic violence situation. Police had been called to their apartment many times before so there was a history with him. This particular beating went on for like 30-45 minutes - the guy had like 100lbs on her (neighbors did nothing), until he pulled out a gun. She was able to get it from him and fired two shots, which is when neighbors finally called police. He didn't die until the next day when she was in custody. All charges were dropped. She is still in therapy years later, and has PTSD and extreme guilt for killing someone she loved. But she is trying to help domestic abuse survivors constantly now and is trying to rebuild her life.
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While working at a bar, one of those shady characters you all keep bringing up pulled a knife on my female coworker. I blew up and immediately went head to head with him tackle/headbutt style and we both went down together. When my head cleared up from the blow i notice an enormous amount of blood all around us, and found the knife sticking through my forearm, and his skull split wide open on the concrete. We did everything to save him, but to this day i don't know if he survived. No charges were ever filed against me because the knife sticking out of me was evidence enough of self defense.
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This is insanity. It's just so far removed from where I live that it's hard to imagine things like that. You hear about stuff like this happening but you don't really get a perspective, so thanks for that. I'm sorry you had to go through this.
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Some guy tried to rob me and my sister. She tossed him her purse and when he kneeled down to pick it up, I shot and killed him. I think in the end, I was more upset that killing him didn't really bother me than I was about killing him. I've pretty much raised my sister since she was born, and she's more like a daughter to me than a sister. I'd do anything to protect her, so seeing this man point a gun at her pretty much killed any regret I might have otherwise had.
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