Therapists, what are some Red Flags we should look for in therapists?
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"If a therapist gives you any attitude when you ask to see proof of their licensure or additional training, for example, if they do eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) for PTSD. Also if a therapist gives you an attitude about seeking a second opinion, that is not the right therapist for you. I welcome you getting a second opinion. I have a section in Chapter 12 of my book Gaslighting where I discuss what to look for in a therapist, and what to watch out for. Also, on a side note - "coaches" are not licensed or regulated in any state, so ask them for their credentials and training. If a coach is not a licensed mental health professional, it is illegal for them to give you psychotherapy in any form. Psychotherapy includes, but is not limited to, discussing your family of origin, past trauma, diagnosis, and treatment. (Edited to add that my state, Florida, requires I have my license in clear view in my office, but not sure if other states have this rule.) "
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If they work in a lot of things about themselves and their lives.
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Therapist here It's important to know what kind of therapy you're interested in. Do you want to know more about yourself and why you are the way you are? A psychoanalyst might be better for you. Do you want to tackle a specific issue such as anxiety/depression/eating disorder etc? Look into CBT or more behavioral based therapists. Make sure they are using evidenced based practices. This will heavily influence the kind of therapy you receive. Sometimes people dont want advice, just reflection. Sometimes people want very specific things to be addressed in therapy. One thing I haven't seen mentioned yet is that it's important that you both know what you're here to work on. What are your goals in treatment
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Does it seem like he or she is telling you what you want to hear? Chances are, you went to a therapist in the first place because something isn't going well in your life. If all they are doing is validating your way of thinking without challenging you and offering to teach strategies to help you going forward, chances are therapy from that person isn't going to be any more useful than chatting with your bartender at your favorite pub. Also, therapists too often forget that people lie. If they take patient self-report as gospel, important factors may be missed.
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Therapist here. They should never make judgements about people in your life, especially your SO. It's pretty basic that you can't form an opinion on someone based on your patient's description. Doesn't mean they never say anything about the relationship, but they should seek a lot of information and only talk about people in relation to you.
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"I'd like to take this time to remind everyone that it's important to find a therapist with whom you can "click." If their personality is a clash with yours or their modality doesn't work for you, it's fine to find someone else, Hell, it's expected. This is kind of my own personal style showing in a way, but I'm of the opinion that if every session the therapist is talking more than the client, there's something very wrong. It's a little normal for them to interrupt you to focus on something you said here and there, or direct you if you lose your way, but if they're yammering on and you can't even talk about what you wanted to, I'd say that's a pretty big red flag for me. That said, I'd still say give it a couple sessions before deciding on that, because the first session can often mean a lot of information gathering, so they have to touch on a lot of things. "
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"I tried taking to a therapist about abuse I'd suffered as a child. She shut me down and said we should "be talking about positive things and looking forward to my future". She did what every toxic adult had done in my life - tell me to avoid my trauma. What a poisonous therapist and experience. "
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The worst things a therapist can do: Give you solutions and telling you exactly what to do instead of helping you find them. Starting with a faith approach treatment. I have know of therapist whose immediate approach is to evangelize the patient, disregarding their believes. A therapist is not a pastor. One thing is discussing your beliefs, another one is the therapist imposing them. A therapist needs to be a blank space where the patient starts putting their ideas. Among the things that means, is that should not be judgmental, and should not involve or establish personal feelings towards you. Is not there to be your friend or partner.
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Therapist here! The big three are as follows: talking about themselves in a way that is too detailed or detracts the attention and focus from you. Advice giving, we are not here to tell you what to do. Not referring you on when an issue is out of their competency. For example, attempting to treat LGBTQ issues without training or skills with that particular population.
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