A controversial new fighting game similar to Mortal Kombat was just released, featuring every U.S President. Who would have what moves and abilities and why?
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Bush Jr. - A tank rolls up, dude pokes his head out and lassos you. The tank then takes off, dragging you away like that one statue of Saddam Obama - Unceremonious drone strike Reagan - A Nicaraguan death squad armed with brand new US weapons surrounds you and beats the shit out of you before lighting you on fire. Or you come down with AIDS and Reagan stands around groping Nancy while you waste away over the next few months. Carter - He constructs a home around you but, like an evil Sims player, he didn't put in any doors or windows. You starve to death inside.
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damn as much as i hate liberal jokes a fatality by ripping off someones genitals would be fucking hilarious
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William Henry Harrison would start rounds at like 2% health.
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George Washington can summon a boat and ram it into his opponent's
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Trump would have two main specials, the first would be to pay someone to hold the opponent, while he beats him, humiliate and shave the opponent's hair, and the second would be to build a wall and hit the enemy's head against the wall and in the end the wall would fall down against the opponent.
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You could, like, hook the prez on the receiving end of a combo up with some sort of PTSD that affects them for the rest of the fight. Except for Ronnie Ray-Gun. He has the power to forget.
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"Abraham Lincoln has the unique "emancipate" ability, which disarms all presidents the came before him, but is useless on his successors. George Bush is Magikarp. He just hurts himself in his confusion. "
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All I know is that Andrew Jackson would be the absolute best character in the game.
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George W. Bush and his biceps the weapons of mass destructions
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