ER doctors. What is one of your favorite ""This dumbass"" cases you have experienced in regards to the patient?

I remember this one guy who came into the er thinking he had some sort of alien parasite under his skin. He was convinced he could feel it moving around his arm. Turns out, he’d actually tried to "remove" it himself using a rusty box cutter he found in his garage. He ended up needing a bunch of stitches and a tetanus shot, not because of any parasite, but because he was literally carving into his own arm over a patch of dry skin he mistook for a creature.

Another classic was this dude who decided it would be a great idea to use a powerful leaf blower to cool himself off after working in the yard. He pointed the nozzle way too close to his face, and the pressure was so intense it actually blew his eyelid inside out and caused a nasty corneal abrasion. He sat there in the waiting room looking like something out of a horror movie, just complaining that his eye felt "a bit dry" even though it was bright red and swollen shut.

Honestly, you see stuff like this more often than you'd think. People just don't have any common sense when they're trying to fix things themselves or when they get a weird idea in their head. It's usually the simple, avoidable accidents that make you just shake your head and wonder how they managed to make it to adulthood without getting into even worse trouble.