ors who were head over heels in love with their S/O but got divorced, what went wrong?
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He had a severe anxiety disorder and decided he didn't want to take his medication anymore. He became worse and worse despite me trying to change what I did and how I talked to avoid upsetting him. One day I came home from a hard day at work (I was the breadwinner) and asked if he could do the dishes because I was exhausted. He flipped out and left and never came back. Straight up abandoned me. I called everyone he knew, no one knew where he was. Filed a missing persons report. A week later he called me from his mother's (she had lied to me when I called her and said she didn't know where he was - he had gone straight to her place and was there the whole time...leaving me to be worried sick). He said he was too sick to be with anyone and said he wanted a divorce despite my pleas to go to couples counseling or anything else that might help. Happy ending though, a few years later I met a fantastic guy who treats me better than anyone ever has.
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She cheated on me. Five times. I was going to try again after the last time to forgive and move on, and I met her after she got off work to tell her we could go away for the weekend and figure things out. I had already cleared it with her boss. But she said no. That weekend she was seen at our small town's festival holding hands with the other guy. I haven't looked back. I had a lot of baggage that took some time to get rid of but she was emotionally and verbally abusive and I have never wanted her back. Like, ever.
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I married my best friend. After almost a decade of marriage, she tries for grad school and doesn't get accepted. She started partying and not coming home at night. She tells me that she blew the neighbor, wants a divorce, and that I was the reason for being unhappy. I was willing to work on things but she called the police claiming that I was emotionally abusing her. Now, we are a year into a nasty divorce and custody battle. Her boyfriend moved in with her and our three toddlers within a month of me moving out. Tldr - my ex blamed everything on me.
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Fucking everybody but me, and emotionally abusing the shit out of me. Also, hugs to all y'all.
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"1) Constant cheating 2) Constant lying 3) Financial ruin over and over 4) Completely irresponsible 5) Emotionally abusive (manipulations, gas-lighting, etc) 6) Sexually assaulted people (me included) on multiple occasions 7) Barely helped take care of his dying mother even when his sister was drowning and I was stepping in to help when I could 8) Controlling of my time to the point he became jealous of the time I spent with family. 9) Would not get actual help for his BPD, his ADD, hypochondria, or his Depression/Anxiety. Everyone was "against him" or "didn't believe him" when it came to doctors/therapists. 10) Everything he claimed to love about me became things he would hold against me later on (being honest about my past, etc). 11) The fact that I'm already to #11 and could just keep listing things off until I ran out of characters.... The divorce will hopefully be final before the end of the year. "
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She still wanted to party and deal drugs, I grew up, got a real job and she resented it. Didn't last long after that.
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We grew up. We were high school sweethearts. We loved each other deeply. We were together for 18 years. I went through a spiritual phase, meditating and yoga. He wanted to spread his wings and ride with new biker friends. He also didn't want to be tied down to new house, kids, maybe me. He is deceased now. I still think and dream about him often. And I still tell the kids and others what a good guy he was.
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"I let my mental health get the best of me. I've always been back and forth with depression. I started trying different meds, seeing a therapist. Etc. She didnt understand, so she shut down, kinda pretended i was ok, when i wasn't. This led me to externalizing my own feelings and anxieties on the relationship and on her. I guess it was easier to make her "the bad guy". Then I met a coworker who was in my same boat and understood me, she was good to talk to, which furthered the stress on my marriage. So I left. 18 months later I have my shit together and I realize that it was all my fault and not hers, I wish I had stuck it out a little longer. "
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